an excerpt

"the truth is there are a million steps, and we don't even know what the steps are, and worse, at any given moment we may not be willing or even able to take them; and still worse, they are different for you and me and they are always changing. i have come to believe the sooner we find this truth beautiful, the sooner we will fall in love with the God who keeps shaking things up, keeps changing the path, keeps rocking the boat to test our faith in Him, teaching us to not rely on easy answers, bullet points, magic mantras, or genies in lamps, but rather in His guidance, His existence, His mercy, and His love.
personally, i was miserable before i understood these ideas, but now i am so happy i laugh all the time, even in my sleep."
-donald miller

i need to believe in myself more

i don't know where to start. . .or end. i am just having a hard time right now. . .repetition in life can be annoying and taxing on one's spirit. my spirit is tired from stepping in the wrong directions, believing they were the path. i lack freshness. my spirit is spent on misperceived conceptions of reality. it will be nice one day to quit the games.

i guess it's nice to know that i'm not alone. . ."if one wishes to eliminate uncertainty, tension, confusion, and disorder from one's life, there is no point in getting mixed up with either yahweh or with jesus of nazareth" andrew greeley

i have now come to some conclusions. . .1, dreams don't mean shit; 2, i'm pretty sure i am suppose to change the world; 3, i don't know how to accomplish #2; to be continued. . .

i don't know how to describe it. . . can't put into words. . . but it never stops

nyc

i am so excited. i am going to new york to visit my friend danny. i have never been to new york, and so i am ecstatic to be going. it is going to be cold? yes, but that is alright, because the three of us guys in ny is going to be some good times!

i think there may be something seriously wrong with me?

my soul longs for rest. . . i do sleep at night, but never wake up in the morning feeling rested. . . always unsettled

i've read and heard it said that you are suppose to marry the one that you can't live without, not the person you think you can live with. . .but my question is, what if you person you can't live without can live without you?

do you ever find yourself wishing you were some one else. . .i'm pretty sure i was supposed to be johnny cash or bono or mother teresa or bob marley or. . . some one else. . .